Fun with your semi-perfectionist seventh grader May 9, 2008

Me this morning: “Hey James?”

J: “Yeah?”

Me: “I had a look at your grades this morning.”

J: “oh yeah?”

Me: “Yeah. Did you know you’re getting an F in Math?”

(sounds of scrambling out of the bathroom, various bottles dropping, running down the hall)

J: “WHAT?!?!?!?!? I got an A on the test yesterday, I’ve turned in all my work, I don’t understand! Oh my God! Oh my GOD! What? What? OH MY GOD!”

Me: “Yeah, it’s an F all right…..(pause for dramatic effect)….it’s an F for FABULOUS! Ha ha! You’re getting a B-, dude! That’s awesome! Best ever!”

J: (falls over) “That’s so not cool, Mom.” (stomps back to bathroom)

Me: “Heh heh.”

And……scene!

I am a VERY BAD PERSON. November 20, 2007

Know why? I’ll tell you. I read my 13 year old’s diary. This guy.

See, here’s what happened. I decided to take a break and clean the house….well, at least make things look pretty. So I was in his room, and decided to make his bed, and the diary just kind of fell out from under his pillow and I ALMOST took the high road and didn’t read it but then I was all like “Hey! I could put this in my blog, since I don’t really have anything else to write about” and things just kind of steamrolled from there.

So! Here are a few snippets that we can laugh at learn from.

Today I had to do chores all day. I think Mom and Dad are determined to make me as miserable as possible.

HA HA HA! Oh, crap, I just peed myself laughing at how pathetic this is, and yet so poignant. Onward:

I am so hot for (girl at school). I hope I can hook up with her.

Exsqueeze me? Baking powder? You are NOT ALLOWED to be hot for girls at your age and while you’re under my roof. Wait until you’re about, oh, let’s say, 34. Then I don’t have to think about the fact that Mommy’s Widdle Baby is a horndog.

Pretty much the rest of the journal is in one or both of these lines of thinking. I’ll update with more once he writes in there again……I’ll have to hurdle various moral objections that my conscience will throw at me for doing this, but that shouldn’t be much of an issue.

I’ve got the 12 year old blues….doo doo wah January 31, 2007

Having a 12 year old around the house is an interesting experience.

Interesting in the way that a torn off fingernail is interesting, I mean.

I’m invoking my parental right to pinch off his head the next time he gives me That Look, by the way - it’s a little known coducil, doncha know.

I love him, but could he quit being moody for a second? I’m tired of sending him to his room every five minutes.

This too shall pass. This too, shall pass.

Calm blue ocean. Calm blue ocean. December 21, 2006

For the past two days, I’ve been doing nonstop laundry. Well, with five people after a four day vacation, what do you expect? So I think I did, oh, something like 15 loads of laundry.

The biggest hurdle in the whole laundry chore thing is the actual folding and putting away of the kids clothes. So last night, I thought it would be fun to sit down with the five (!!!!) baskets of kids’ clothes and watch Bing Crosby’s White Christmas with the kids.

All done, right?

Wrong. This morning, James got a full mug of hot chocolate and brought into the living room even though he had been told five minutes before not to, (you can see where this is going, right?), and Henry got all rowdy and started tossing pillows. One of the pillows knocked the entire mug of hc into the baskets of clean clothes.

So, about five, six hours of work completely wasted. I’m trying to be the Grownup in all of this, but what I really feel like doing is pinching off all of their heads.

My favorite kind of day November 28, 2006

It’s snowy outside, I’m listening to oldies on the stereo, I’ve got peppermint mocha coffee in hand, and I get to write and research all day, sans kids. Well, until about 2:00 at least.

I’ve got to write some more about James now. I worry about him, constantly. He just seems to have no motivation to do anything; and honestly, this isn’t a new thing. He’s been like this since the second grade.

I just wish that he could see that he could be truly exceptional if he wanted to be. If he decided to get off the stick and just DO IT.

If his grades continue to slide the way they are, we’re going to have to consider other options, education-wise. Dean says a big no to homeschooling, and I tend to agree with him, since James fights me in everything. But I wonder if we got him something that was totally self-regulated if he would rediscover his love of learning.

I don’t know. He just seems to be coasting aimlessly; he’s angry about this and doesn’t realize it.

What to do with the middle school moods November 28, 2006

James gave me some lip again this morning; he’s just bought himself a week of early bedtimes.

I go back and forth with this kid. He’s wonderful, he’s funny, he’s doing okay in all the things that really count.

But then there’s the D in math that he just doesn’t really care about, there’s the never hanging around with anyone his own age, and there’s the deep, deep anger at something I can’t figure out.

What happened to my easy kid?

Today was a hard day. September 8, 2006

This was the first week of school in my neck of the woods, and while my oldest has adjusted fantastically to middle school (I KNOW! Amazing!), my two little ones are having a hell of a time.

Emma misses me. She misses her mommy. And I miss her. She misses her best friend, big brother Henry, who depends on her to navigate for him since he doesen’t understand a lot of what is going on around him. And while school was really fun at first, she’s beginning to let me know that it’s just one long day without Mommy and that’s not fun anymore.

This morning, Henry had the Meltdown of All Meltdowns. He *thought* he was going to get to do computers today, but when his teacher told him they didn’t have computers until NEXT week, he just matter of factly picked up his stuff and said “well, then I’m not coming to class” and started walking out to the parking lot. Seriously!

Then the fit started when I told him he’d have to go back to class. Three hours later, after about 10 different education professionals got ahold of him, he finally went back to class.

Here’s where my brain is at right now:

We’re (probably) moving in the next three months. We want to get out of where we live and get back to our friends and family.

We are thinking about homeschooling all three since we both would be home. GASP! I know. I’m scared. But I figure we’ll try it for a year and see what happens. We can’t kill them in a year, right? Right?

I’m tired of Henry having such a hard time, being so far behind, being labeled “special needs.” It breaks my heart. He’s a smart kid but he’s been in school for so long that I don’t know what his potential is anymore! I really don’t! And that scares the shit out of me. He hates to learn and he’s only 8 years old. Can he be rescued from that?

Emma just wants to be with Mommy and brother, how can I look in her big blue eyes and say, “no, you can’t.”

James just wants to be home to learn, to teach himself geology (yep) and write a novel.

I think it’s going to happen. I’m scared. But I can’t put up with this much longer.