Archive for the ‘Madison’ Category

What do you say?

June 20, 2008

We’ve had Madison now for about a week, and after a long day of playing today (along with bickering with cousin Emma – argh), this is what I hear when I put them down for bed:

“I miss my Mom.”

She cried for about five minutes, deep sobs that you don’t normally hear from little seven year old girls. This isn’t just homesickness; Maddy’s mom is in rehab for drugs (meth, pot, you name it), just tested positive for Hep. C, and has a few felonies she’s going to have to deal with. She hasn’t had Madison for years, sees her very rarely, and there is little chance that she’s ever going to be a full-time mom to Madison.

Yet she misses her. What do you do? What do you say?

I know all I could do was cry right along with her, rub her back, and whisper “it’s okay. it’s okay.”



March 30, 2008

This week, our family had the privilege of having my husband’s uncle’s granddaughter (it’s complicated) over for spring break. Her name is Madison, she is 7 years old. Her family situation is complicated: her mom is a homeless drug addict who is currently under investigation for her second felony drug trafficking charge, she also has cervical cancer and is not expected to live more than about five years. She’s also nuts, which is why Maddy is not allowed to see her (g’pa and g’ma have custody; they’re both in their late 60’s, early 70’s, and have custody of her much older brother Nicky, who is a semi-unstable young man.).

Anyway, we had Maddy for spring break, and we are hoping to have her for summer….and beyond. Jan and Donna are, frankly, tired. They are TIRED. A seven year old girl is fun for a while, but she’s all by herself over there. Within five minutes of her meeting us she felt like she was just one of our kids – in fact, she was calling me Mommy by the second day. How’s THAT for a heart puller!

I miss her. I cried all the way home after we dropped her off. She needs a mommy so, so badly. I told her I loved her multiple times this week and I hope she remembers that. She called us tonight, just to talk to me, which made me feel both better and worse.

It’s not that she’s in a horrible situation or anything – she’s with people who love her. But everyone needs a mommy, and I feel like God – what I believe of God, anyway – put this child in our lives for a really big reason. I knew it the instant I saw her – I know that sounds corny, and cliche, but it was like she was my kiddo.

I did talk to Jan and Donna, and they are totally for Maddy coming to stay with us this summer. Anything beyond that is unfortunately out of our hands because of nutso Mom who apparently has a bit of parental rights left, even though she’s going to be going to prison very soon. I guess the only thing I can do is continue to stay in contact with her, love her, and try to be patient. It’s hard…especially when I just did my nightly check of the kids just now and I looked around for Maddy so I could cover her up with a blanket, like I’ve done every night this week, and tuck in her teddy bear more comfortably.

I miss her.